Personal Development & Low Self Esteem Counselling
Self-esteem is an integral part of psychological wellbeing and influences the way people think, feel and behave.
High self-esteem is linked to satisfying relationships, successful work or career endeavours and general mental wellbeing. Low self-esteem is linked to psychological difficulties such as depression and anxiety, as well as self-sabotaging behaviours, dysfunctional relationships and a host of other risky behaviours.
If improving low self-esteem is important to you, get the help and support you need by taking part in low self-esteem counselling at the Centre for Human Potential. We offer highly effective cognitive behavioural therapy combined with a supportive and welcoming environment where you can talk through your self-esteem issues openly with one of our professional psychologists.
So if you want to boost your self-esteem and bring your confidence back, make a booking with us today and discover how low self-esteem counselling can help improve your self-worth.
What is Low Self Esteem?
People easily talk about having high or low self-esteem and confidence, but what does this concept really refer to? Self-esteem really refers to the way in which a person sees themselves holistically.
Self-esteem refers to:
- The persons’ self-concept
- Whether they believe in themselves and their abilities
- If they feel positively or negatively about the way they look
- If they feel positively or negatively about the way they behave socially
- How they feel about how they are moving through life in general
So self-esteem is actually quite a broad concept, but it is also a very important one.
When someone has a high self-esteem it really means that they:
- Feel positively about themselves
- Believe in themselves as loveable, successful and worthy people
- Feel competent and autonomous
- Feel positive about the way they look and behave
High Self Esteem & Low Self Esteem
Having high self-esteem is important for many reasons, such as increased positive feelings, more satisfying relationships, and more successful experiences in social and occupational life and a general mental wellbeing.
In most cases, the way a person feels about themselves largely determines their ability to bounce back from challenging or difficult situations. So self-esteem also determines resilience in general.
On the other hand, when someone has low self-esteem they generally feel negatively about themselves. They may not like the way they look, they may not believe that other people find them interesting or likeable and they may not have any belief in their own ability to achieve and succeed.
Low self-esteem also has a negative impact on psychological and emotional functioning. In this sense, people with low self-esteem are more likely to struggle with psychological difficulties such as depression and anxiety. Due to the fact that they don’t believe in themselves, they may self-sabotage any chance of success.
This is where low self-esteem counselling and talking with one of our Brisbane psychologists can help restore balance and self-value. This is probably due to a fear of failing and thus, not giving themselves the chance to succeed in the first place. When talking with our caring and qualified Brisbane psychologists during a low self-esteem counselling session, you will find solutions and guidance to help you along the path towards positive self-esteem.
Most people struggling with low self-esteem will also likely struggle with dysfunctional and unhappy relationships. Perhaps they find themselves with a partner who do not respect them and treats them badly. In general, people with low self-esteem will also engage in risk-taking behaviours such as substance abuse and in general find that they are emotionally distressed.
Improving Self Esteem - What Can You Do?
Working with a counsellor or psychologist in a low self esteem counselling session is an effective way of increasing self-esteem and identifying self-sabotaging behaviours. Therapy is aimed at exploring past experiences that ‘broke’ you down and works at raising your confidence and self-worth.
But there are a few things you can do for yourself for improving self-esteem:
- Being real about your strengths and limitations. It’s easy to generalise and say “I’m useless” or “I’m ugly”, but these statements do not incorporate the whole of you. No matter who you are or where you have come from, you will have strengths as well as limitations. Start being a little more realistic about these.
Get a piece of paper and write down 10 of your strengths as well as your perceived limitations. You will find that the limitations column is much easier to come up with and if you have trouble finding 10 strengths, think of what other people have said about you or to you.
Perhaps you are a good listener, you have a funky way of dressing, you are creative, or are good with animals – you will have plenty of individual talents that make you special and unique! Being more real about having strengths and limitations helps you get a more balanced view of yourself that isn’t only negative.
- Focus on your assets. Instead of focusing on the things you can’t do, or the limitations that you perceive, shift focus onto your strengths. Each day, try think of one positive attribute and focus on that for the day.
- Remember you are unique. While the temptation is there to compare yourself to the beautiful people on the centre page of the latest glossy magazine, remember that everyone is different. We could all look like that if we were airbrushed too. In reality, we all have differences in shape, size and ability. No two people are alike and what a variety that allows for. Stop focusing on your differences as limitations and start seeing them as part of what makes you uniquely you.
- Adjust your self-image when necessary. If you are basing your current self-image on what you were 10 or 15 years ago, then you are being unfair to your current self. Be prepared to adjust your self-image to something that, again, is realistic and achievable. Wearing a size 8 at school and now, at age 30, fitting into a size 12 is absolutely normal.
- Set realistic goals. Nothing will beat up on self-esteem as much as not achieving what you set out to do. Reaching for the moon is not a bad thing in itself, but make sure that the goals and expectations you are setting yourself are actually realistic and achievable. Start small and revel in the sense of accomplishment as you slowly, and in baby steps, reach your dreams.
- Remember that perfection is a myth! No one is perfect and striving to be is simply exhausting and unfulfilling. Rather, strive for accomplishments and learn from the mistakes you make.
- Exercise, exercise, exercise! We cannot stress this enough. Exercise assists with improving low self-esteem and all other mental health difficulties including depression and anxiety. Getting some blood flowing helps you to think clearly and feel energised. You will start to look better too, and this only feeds self-esteem in general. Besides – it is a great accomplishment to have run that extra 2 kilometres.
- Laugh as much as you can. Laughter is certainly the best medicine. Surround yourself with people that make you feel good and have a good laugh from the belly up. Nothing will make you feel better than that.
How is Low Self Esteem Treated?
Low self-esteem in and of itself is not a mental disorder per se, but because low self-esteem can have such a powerful impact on the person’s emotional and psychological functioning, improving low self-esteem is an important problem to focus on and seek assistance for.
Low self-esteem counselling not only provides a supportive base from which to explore any negative feelings about self, but it also provides the person with a non-judgemental space to begin identifying the self-sabotaging behaviours and dysfunctional relationships that the individual is involved in.
Therapy and low self-esteem counselling with one of our Brisbane psychologists will help the individual explore past experiences and to identify the experiences that have contributed to low self-esteem and confidence. By identifying these experiences, it makes it easier to start challenging negative beliefs about one’s self.
Cognitive behaviour therapy is also used in therapy to identify any self-defeating, distorted and negative beliefs about self and the individual’s own abilities. These distorted beliefs are challenged, and a new positive way of viewing one’s self is encouraged, thereby increasing self-esteem.
In this sense, after a few sessions of low self-esteem counselling, the individual can begin to experience a more balanced and rational view of self that contributes to higher self-esteem and confidence. The individual will be able to identify areas in his or her life in which they are able to excel and will, more than likely, feel more motivated and positive to try and succeed.
With each success, self-esteem and confidence will grow and the cycle will continue. Any distorted thoughts and negative self-perceptions will regularly be challenged, giving the individual more control over their thoughts and feelings in general – improving self-esteem overall.
If you suffer from low self-esteem, contact us today to book a counselling appointment with our highly trained Brisbane psychologists.